Candid Confessions

My life, My Words and My Journey:

Updated Manuscript

Im So excited, I finally found the time to correctly upload the proper formatted document for my kindle book, so its finally edited correctly. Yay!

Another rainy cold day…

Woke up at 1 am and decided to go ahead and just stay up… Boo went to work about 5:30am and I decided to doze off and wake up about 6-ish to Boo getting home, super early, only to tell me they may lay him off. I think to myself, yay, I’ve got him home with me for awhile…. But Then bills, bills and more bills… No, he’s got to work, Damn It! The house has been strange if not weird. I’m never up there when anyone is up, do ask my stuff early in the wee morning… then hide all day down in my room. Ahhhh, my den… my world… all mine.


Great way to end the weekend!

Normal wakeup in the morning, not. I checked my blood sugar and it was 151, Damn, I cant stop the metformin that keeps it down in the first place, I’ve lost the weight, I still have high blood pressure and am almost diabetic, Shit. A few weeks ago I tried to stop all the meds I thought that I didn’t need anymore. One was my anti-depressant and the other was the metformin to keep my blood sugar low. So, yes I smoke, I like a beer or two now and then and I am going blind. Shit, Great way to end the weekend with the sad realization that I am really just an old bitch these days. yep! ol bitch. Cant enjoy the simple things in life like a beer and a smoke.


I dont hate the bullies I JUST HATE ME

I can totally relate to your feelings and think you put it perfect. be well, talk soon…mona



I have never hated anyone or anything apart from myself, for what I am (male), what I am not (female), for what I have (him and his brains (dick)).

I do not hate the bully who picked on me for seeing I was wearing my Sisters underclothes when I was 5 years old. Bullying me and deliberately pushing me down into a corner of a wall  leaving me unconscious for a few minutes, giving a two inch scar and stitches on my right eyebrow.

I do not hate the bullies when at 11 and after I was forced to do PE, undressing and again I was wearing my sisters underclothes and had my toenails painted, started to stab me often with maths compasses in my arms, legs, back and kidneys on a daily basis.

I do not hate the bully who still held a grudge against me for being different…

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Good Morning or not.

Yesterday I recieved news that threw me sideways. As you know I recently brought my daughter and grandson home to live with me after a bad experience with a guy in Florida that abandoned her and my grandson. We made agreements to get her life together and agreed that a relationship wasn’t what she needed as of yet. We’ll she moved some guy in she met online, he lost his car, can’t find a job, Now Wants my daughter to move to another state and start over….. she’s got a good job here and is on her way to being self sufficient. But if she leaves before she’s actually grown up…. Well I made it clear its her choice. I won’t be there the third time she runs off when responsibilities get tough.


I love her and want the best, but sometimes all you can do is let them go when you’ve said and done all you can do. And I’m at my wits end.


I wish her well!