It’s a wonderful day to be me. Rainy, wet and cold. Yep, That”s me these days. As cynical and mistrusting as I have become in my old age, I still manage to take a moment from time to time to reflect on what life has dealt me and to focus on goals and where exactly I am at in regards to accomplishing them.
And I have to admit that at my age, life has been really good. I am thankful for all that has happened because if it had not took place I may not be the person that I am today. And as ugly as I am I still try and remember that in spite of how ugly other people have made me, I am after all still quite a beauty, even at my age.
I have managed to pull it off, life’s difficult tasks, and have been able to take a step backwards and take a deep breath and take hold of reality head on and make the right decisions and get my drinking together. I have managed to repair some of the damaged relationships that I have had over the past few years. although, where family is concerned, they are still missing in non-action. I no longer have a desperate need to over-react in anger and saying things I don’t mean and or can’t take back.
And I have actually met a decent man that isn’t promising the world, but is loving, understanding and supportive. He isn’t rich, but then I am not dependent on him either. we compliment one another in many aspects of life and where we don’t, we compromise.
I can honestly say without conviction that I have moved on. Sure I will never forget about the things I have had to go through before I was able to learn to be an adult.
In spite of how ugly, challenging and opinionated the worlds vast population are. I have managed to keep my head up and not be swayed in my determination to be ME!
NEVER people, will you dictate how I should look, think, feel, be and act. This is my world. I am the goddess of my world in spite of the rebellion of the rest of the people. Don’t waste any time to feel sorry for me, don’t take the time to think about how I feel. You won’t any way. And I will not be waiting. Don’t be intimidated, jealous or hurt. Because I do not make any kind of apology for being who I am. I love me! I love being me! looking like me!
On another note, I am so elated that I recently decided to start the ethinyl-estrodiol treatment again after just taking the premarin, provera for so many years, I don’t have any issue with unwanted hair growth or a barritone voice. I guess I just wanted a bump to feel ultra sexy again before I get too old. ( someday) So make sure you’re doing you and enjoy life. Don’t hate, live and let live. Because if you don’t, remember: I really don’t care about what the world thinks.